Decided

I have decided to believe that this cycle will end in a BFP until otherwise noted.  I will respond great to the Clomid and O when I need to. Donor Sperm will have great postwash count and all will go fine! I believe that we will have a May baby and when my birthday comes in April, we will be putting finishing touches on the babies room!

Honestly

A part of me wants to invision a BFP. Wants to invision our DS meeting with my egg and doing a little dance in my body, making the baby that we want to very very much. I want to, I really do. I want to think of the moment we will get that call from the RE nurse "Congratulations your beta came back positive and the numbers are great!"

Then another part of me creeps in and says " Dont do it, dont you dare think that will happen this month!" and im torn. Do I stay thinking positive and invisioning they dance that will go in within my body and hopefully result in a LO or do I protect my heart and know it wont work?

Reality..

C and I talked last night about the emotional and physical toll that IF and TTC has taken on me so far. I told her that I know it has only been coming up on 3 medicated cycles and if it doesn't work this time, or the next or the next or the next, Im not sure how much I will be able to handle and I know that if we don't get pregnant sooner then later we will eventually have to make the choice to stop. For now we are happy and healthy and hoping that the 3rd times a charm.

World Record

I feel like I could honestly get a world record for how many time I am in the bathroom a day. I dread taking my meds every night and I cant wait for it to stop!

Number 2

Man! Hot flash number 2 @ 11pm!

Spoke to soon...

Hot flash #1 @ 8:58pm...

Progesterone Day #1

So far so good. No hot flashes today but I have felt like AF arrived ALL DAY! However, when I check, there is nothing there.

Here's to hoping tomorrow is as good as today.

OK, Go!

I got the go ahead from Dr. D to start taking the progesterone tonight. Instructions are as follows and as usual. Take for 10 days then wait for AF.

(Left to Right)
Progesterone(10mg), Metformin(1700mg) & Prenatal(that tastes like crap)

C'mon round number 3!

Whirlwind

I feel like when I don't write for a while, there is then to much to write and it overwhelms me. So, I don't write. I let the days turn into weeks without writing a blog and that is not what this is intended for. I made this blog to chronicle our journey to motherhood and all that it held. I will not attempt to write what has already happened, I will simply start from here.

Our next apointment with Dr.D was set for July 21st, early morning. About 2 weeks ago, after the shock that I had O'd and had AF without Provera had set it, C and I were talking. I asked her if she thought I should email Dr. D and let him know what has been going on. Well, I did. I emailed him and filled him in on the details of the last month or so and asked what he thought. I wanted him to email me back and say that we could cycle soon and start the Clomid and what do ya know, he did just that. The "plan" is to wait for CD 1 then call for an ultrasound on CD 3-5. Then start the Clomid.

I dont know what it is but I have a feeling about this cycle. I feel confident like I never have before and feel good going into this.