I figure 11 days is as good as any to let it out in the open.
Our 2nd IUI was a bust.
I went in for my beta on the 5th only to find out that the paper work had not been sent in and therefore I could not get the blood drawn. I was upset to say the least. C said we should get a HPT to see. So we did.
STARK.WHITE
I said I wasn't going to cry and kept myself busy for a while after the results showed up. As soon as I laid down in bed, I cried. I let loose and cried hard. I didn't want to and tried to stop my self from doing it but I couldn't help it. I cried because I'm not sure if I will ever get pregnant and Im not sure if I will ever be able to give C the family and baby she wants. I cried because I know how badly we both wanted this and again, our dreams were run over by a big rig.
My Clomid cycles are over and next will be Femara. We have decided to not try again until Jan of 2011.
So we are out of sperm, out of money and out of chances with clomid. When you hit the bottom the only way to go is up, right?
I had a bad feeling when we didn't hear anything from you. I'm so sorry sweetie. I really hope the break does you some good and a fresh cycle will bear fruit for you! HUGS.
ReplyDeleteOh, J, I'm so sorry. I was really excited for you two and was hoping this would be the last cycle. It's always weird going from hopeful and excited to being distraught and worried and frustrated and scared and pissed off at the glance of an hpt that's as stark white as Marcia Cross' ass. Wish there was something I could say or do to make it better, but I know better. Hugs to you both.
ReplyDelete*Big Squeezy Hugs*
ReplyDelete